It has been four months since my last confession. I am sure the regular readers are wondering where I have been. Was I abducted by aliens or put in jail for indecent exposure of asshats!? Nope something much more wonderful has happened – the Jojogrrl has met her match! And so, without much further ado this week’s post is – THE LAST POST!
From where I left off I was multidating and meeting the usual run of the mill boychildren that populate this town as well as one or two reasonably nice guys but no one really excited or thrilled me. With that in mind I continued to contact one or two guys online but to be honest my enthusiasm and faith was beginning to fail. I was still working hard at the hospital as the downturn of the economy has sapped the jobs away and the public service is pretty much a closed shop. Anyway, I received a message from Sturm Ritter. He and I communicated back and forth online until eventually we actually spoke on the phone. We had this really long, very easy conversation and made plans to meet at Lucky’s Bar on Friday 16 May at 2130 after I had finished work. However, that day work cancelled so I asked him if we could meet earlier in case he turned out to be the typical tosser or quasimodo and therefore I wasn’t wasting a whole friday night.
Friday came and I threw half a dozen dresses on the bed before settling on my new favourite. Hair up and black high heeled boots on, I was off to meet this man. I got to Lucky’s and asked at the door if a very tall guy had turned up on his own. They pointed me in his direction. This was unusual, a guy actually waiting for me to show – I was intrigued. He stood to greet me and yes! A man I can wear sky high heels with and still actually look petite. Now this has never happened before. I sat down and we ordered a bottle of wine and began the dating patter. He seemed a little standoffish and I recall thinking if this doesn’t change I’m off. It was about half way through the first glass of wine that he seemed to visibly relax. From then on the conversation and the wine flowed. We talked and talked! It was so easy. We had some food and I introduced him to my favourite drink – the espresso martini.
He came back to mine where we continued to talk, listen to music and drink. He is very interested in all sorts of music as he is a composer and has travelled and like me lived overseas. All of this was very promising to me. He was also a complete gentleman and did not put the moves on at all (a keeper eh mum?). Eventually we crashed out and then went out for breakfast in the morning after collecting his car from town and detouring to his so he could shower and change. We spent the whole weekend hanging out. He was and is such a calming influence on me.
Monday came and as I left his house a tradie pranged my car and took out the driver’s side quarter panel and I missed a job interview! So much for starting a relationship with a bang! I was a bit sore and sorry for myself on the tuesday and he had tonsillitis so we stayed home. We had known each other four days and had not had a night apart. He had done what I have been famous for – blitzkrieged his way into my life! He even went to the dreaded facebook and changed his relationship status to ‘in a relationship’ without discussion or begging from me. He was ready to tell the whole world about us and he really didn’t care who knew! This is something I have never experienced – a really decisive man!
Within 10 minutes of changing his status he got a call from She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). I was on the other side of the room and could hear this strident voice haranguing him. Now, this funsters is the main reason I never got involved with men with children i.e. some woman in the background of their lives making demands and thinking they have a say. Unfortunately for me I was a ‘friend’ on fb and I allowed ‘friends of friends’ to read my profile. She had already read about me and the very first thing she said was ‘Well you seem to have yourself a bit of a goer there!’ She had read my page and had read my blog and had thoughtfully passed it around a bit for sundry other people to read. Tips for young players – when you meet someone new, tighten up your social media settings and batten down the hatches. SWMBO was pissed that she had not been consulted prior to Sturm Ritter announcing us to the world.
Anyway, as you can imagine the last four months have rushed by in a blur. I met his parents who have really taken to me as I have healed the rift SWMBO caused within his family which means that after seven years they finally have their son back. I met his kids who seemed to enjoy their time with us. We met various friends. He met my ex sister in law and my nieces and nephew when they visited and we had a day out together. We also visited one of my oldest mates (my brother by another mother – 23 year still going strong!) and my brother and his new family. Also approximately two months after we met, I moved my furniture down from Far North Queensland AND we moved in together! In two weeks time his divorce goes to court and will be absolute in October.
It hasn’t all been smooth sailing. We were both ill for the whole of July and I started a new contract in town. SWMBO refused to do a joint divorce application so Sturm Ritter has had to engage a lawyer. I tried to communicate with her as the children will be in my home and I had such a tough time with my dad and stepmonster but apparently I am irrelevant and should not have any input into how the children are dealt with.
Despite how fast this has all seemed to the outside world, we don’t think so. Except for three days when I had to do a business trip last month we have spent every night together since we met. I never thought I would get involved with a father of young children as I really didn’t want the hassle an ex in that situation brings and I never thought I would meet anyone who I feel so relaxed and at home with.
The relationship I am developing with a man who is not afraid to communicate with me, who does not take me for granted and is considerate towards me in so many ways that I have never experienced before is just such a wonderful surprise to me. I hoped this would happen but didn’t really think I would get to hang up my dance shoes so soon.
And so, I am now on to another stage of my life….Stay tuned for ‘Adventures in Stepmonstering’ (Coming one day when SWMBO facilitates him seeing his children). In the meantime I am enjoying the stability and love that so many people take for granted but to me is more precious than all the money you can earn.
Until sometime soon, stay safe
PS To all you followers and others who have regularly tuned in to read about the trials and tribulations of my quest to find someone who appreciated my slightly skewed worldview, I have to say THANK YOU! It is because of you and the ridiculousness of this blog that I persisted for so long and didn’t take up vows of poverty and become a nun. I hope I have amused you, shocked you, made you think or just made you appreciate the partner you have.